Just a reminder…my journal blogs are mostly for me and the few people that truly want to know what I do on a daily basis. Read or ignore as you please. Unless otherwise stated, I greet my main altars twice a day and say prayers before bed. Warning: may contain rants…rants by definition are not based on logic and are solely for the purpose of clearing headspace so that I can address things in a more positive fashion. Read more…
I’ve been stewing a lot of late over the appropriateness of ranting here, why I do it and why I am dismayed at the prospect of not being able to do so any longer (because it has come back to bite me on the ass).
I read something that made me realize why I like to use this platform as the main place for my rants. If I rant to a person or group, they feel like they have to respond in some fashion whether it is with sympathy, lectures or what not. Ranting here means no one is forced to respond unless they feel called to do so and rarely does that happen. So I can dump, have it “witnessed” only if the reader chooses by putting the rant behind a cut. This way I do not end up feeling like I’ve cornered someone and dumped my negative output on them. That always results in my inner bully ragging at me. Here it is a shovel, dump and move on. I could keep all the rants private but that would mean not getting a viewpoint that may be necessary for appropriate action on my part.
A rant generally means that I’ve got an emotional investment in a situation that is preventing me from acting appropriately. The purpose of the rant is to remove that emotional energy (as often as necessary) until that well is dry so that I can act appropriately. I would like those that are the subject of my rants to realize that it is better I do that here than say it loudly and probably rudely to their face. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t need to rant.
I come from a family where shouting, foul language, etc is the typically beginning of arguments where the air is cleared of emotion (this includes more often than not, tears) so that progress can be made. My husband’s family isn’t like that and so ranting here has become my safety valve so that I can participate in a way that is productive for them. Which way is better? I like to think my family’s way because things are dealt with fairly immediately. The other method allows things to build or be put off for long periods of time until someone comes unglued. Then the receiver of the explosion is confused/hurt/upset because xyz has been happening for a long time… However this method does occasionally allow for things to resolve “naturally” but that doesn’t always mean for the better. Shrug. I’ve been with my husband long enough (24 years), that I’ve picked up some of those habits, so I float between the two methods. Ranting here helps keep me from yelling and screaming in the faces of others that would cause them to shut down.
Sigh. That is my thoughts any way.
Just a reminder…my journal blogs are mostly for me and the few people that truly want to know what I do on a daily basis. Read or ignore as you please. Unless otherwise stated, I greet my main altars twice a day and say prayers before bed. FYI: rants by definition are not based on logic and are solely for the purpose of clearing my headspace so that I can address things in a more positive fashion.
So I was reading one of my favorite magazines (Mental Floss) when I fascinating tidbit caught my interest.
“When U.S. forces learned that the Vietcong were superstitious about playing cards–believing the ace of spades foretold death–they dispersed thousands through the jungle.” (Pg 46, Mental Floss, Dec 2013)
Last summer I learned that my dad, who was in the Army Reserves for 20+ years, had worked in PsyOps and not Supply as I had been told as a child. So I called him and asked him about this. He said that once they found that out they put the Ace of Spades on everything they dropped, especially pamphlets with slogans on it.
He also went on to say that they were trained in finding someone’s weak spot and then exploit that weak spot. Every culture has one. Then he had to go or else “your mother is going to exploit me”. I must have caught them about to head out the door somewhere. But that one little statement explains my father extremely well. He was trained to find the weak spot and exploit it. My father was not an easy man to grow up with…whether he meant to or not, he could reduce me to tears quicker than anything. Nothing was every good enough…and now I know why. As a young man, he was trained in psychological warfare and it became part of his personality, willingly or not. It is only since my son was born (who is the apple of his Grandpa’s eye) that I’ve started developing a more…loving(?) relationship with my father. It doesn’t excuse everything but it does explain in it in a manner that puts it in a completely different perspective.
May Ares aid all soldiers in reintegrating into their home life so that love is felt on both sides. May their training not have a negative effect on their loved ones. May we all find appropriate ways of dealing with that which is challenging in our lives.
This is very applicable to my life I think… brackets are my rephrasing of the author’s original writing. This is something I really want to remember.
“People who [have low self-esteem] feel defensive against even minor criticism. They find it intolerable to be confronted with their mistakes, and they often feel judged by others. They often put a lot of energy in trying to be perfect. Remember this: Behind every criticism is a wish. So you could ask [the person] to express what he would prefer, and to leave out all judgment, blame and criticism. If that works, perhaps you have found a way to change the dynamic where you feel criticized and then feel the need to withdraw or attack back.” Neil Rosenthal
found this fascinating…full of things that I didn’t know.
Originally posted on The House of Vines:
Therefore it has always been difficult for me to read things such as:
“O Zeus, why need one say evil of women in detail? It would be enough if you say merely woman.” – Karkinos, Semele Fr. 70
“A man is best off with a nonentity – a woman who sits in the house useless in her stupidity. I hate clever women. I don’t want a woman…
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