Daily Happenings: 12/20 – 12-26
What you see on my blog is a meager slice of my life. I find writing cathartic and so do a lot of ranting and whining, especially in these Daily Happenings posts. Rants by definition are not based on logic. Writing down my rants helps me to clean out the ol’ brain pan so that I can find a solution to whatever is bothering me at the moment.
12/20: Seemed like I was busy all day long. Got the mother gifts prepped. Got cross stitching done on the boychild’s ornament. Need to backstitch it. Worked in the kitchen on sausage, freezing pinto beans and meals. Some stitching, some wrapping of gifts, wrapping of sausage, Bronco game (major freaking fail there)…Ham for dinner (so that ham bone available for New Year’s Day soup and spaghetti squash (which we didn’t care for). Boychild made us dessert (with a bit o’ help).
12/21: Read holiday stories to the boychild this morning…they made me cry…I hate crying. Gifts are wrapped. Come home from work to a pissed off Hubby due to the boychild…not the way I wanted my Solstice Eve to go. Finished stitching and sewing his ornament. Put our hopes and wishes into the remaining section of last year’s yule tree which will go into the stove when Hubby builds it up for the night. Not how I planned on doing things but…it is what it is. May the Kindreds bless and forgive.
12/22: slept very little. Boychild up at 7 to find his books. He even got a book from Santa. Opened gifts, none of us got anything spectacular…let’s just say my inner child is sorely disappointed and I’m having a very hard time not acting like a spoiled brat. Both my son and I are not feeling up to par so taking it easy today.. Getting laundry done so that I can pack and helped Hubby package up the last of the meat. Starting my sister’s ornament. Have three other things to make after I finish all the ornaments and am running out of time. Watched Scrooged with the family while I stitched then made crab au gratin. FYI: wood burning isn’t too bad…unless you are doing it on bamboo…which is hard and STINKS! First time trying this craft…last time on bamboo. More stitching.
I think I’ve figured it out. I am intimidated by the many years and ways that Isis has been honored…I don’t want to screw it up…so it is easier to not do anything…Reading (deck 2): Be creative (don’t suppress your emotions), don’t worry about what came before (the past doesn’t need to equal the future), work independently/relax (pamper yourself and work will flow easier).
12/23: A million little things to do: bake, stitch, laundry, pack…not to mention keeping the child entertained and helpful. Come home from work to once again find my husband raging pissed at our son. Not sure it is all the child’s fault but he certainly didn’t help the situation any. I’ve developed a stuffy nose…cold I think. Finished stitching my sister’s ornament. Finishing her ornament plus her children’s then bed.
12/24: Holiday spirit all used up. Melt downs. Finally made it down the hill. Went to my mothers. Things went fine there, got some great gifts…but when we got to my inlaws’, I went to fill Santa’s stockings only to find that I had left all the food and candy at home. It was 1am and not much open. Finally found a gas station, no thanks to my husband, to put a few things in the stocking…argument/hashing it out with hubby afterwards.
12/25: Wore out. Boychild didn’t seem to notice the light stockings. MIL made dinner, Hubby’s grandfather attended.
I no longer find peace/fulfilment in writing these dailies. I have no idea what I’ll do with this blog but I’ve wore myself out so I’m going to step back and try to recharge. This holiday season was very wearing on me, mentally and physically leaving no room for the spiritual. I got very little joy out of giving or getting. I need to find a new start. Isis and Zeus bless.