Daily Happenings: 2/8 – 2/14
Just a reminder…my journal blogs are mostly for me and the few people that truly want to know what I do on a daily basis. Read or ignore as you please. Been trying to greet my main shrines twice a day when home but usually only get it done in the evenings…been getting a bit better at it but still not completely steady… and say prayers before bed. Warning: may contain rants…rants by definition are not based on logic and are solely for the purpose of clearing headspace so that I can address things in a more positive fashion.
2/8: Slept well. Finished the poem that I started last night. Posted on Oaken Scrolls. Tried out the new egg cooker from Pampered Chef for my son’s breakfast…he approved. Gives us another option for quick breakfasts for him. Watched “Voyage of the Dawntreader” with the boychild. Good movie but completely different from the book. I hate it when they do that. Reading chapters to the boychild between him doing chores. Carnitas for dinner. Caught my son reading an hour after his bedtime…was NOT pleased.
2/9: another rough night. Would love to poison the brain gerbil that insists on running that bloody wheel all night. Short workout. Errands. Work. Lunch. Work. Funny moment of the day…my son teaching me how to do the decomposition method of subtraction. Finished book.
2/10: finished reading one of my son’s books to him this morning. I read to him in the morning if he is ready early for school. Love that he shares my love of books. Short workout. Started new book. Work. Home. Boychild’s report card is pretty good but has a few areas that need some work…like organization, attitude, legibility and working independently. Ego bruise…my son thinks I’m fat. It was brought up in the context of what happens when one eats too much. I did point out that the belly is due to me carrying his butt for 9 months and that my body never recovered, just ask my hips. It is silly to be bruised by this but I am. My mental/dream image of myself is the size 8 that I was when I met Hubby. That belly isn’t gonna go away, even if I worked really hard. It would get smaller but it is stretched “geriatric mother” skin and would require surgery…yet still my ego hurts. He has no idea that I was offended…I’m not fat but I am overweight…and lazy and ridden by an insomnia beast from hell. Some days it is all I can do to get through the day without loosing it. Sigh tonight isn’t one of those nights. Brought home an old book from one of the donation piles. Too old and beat up for the library to keep. I’m guessing it is from the 1920s. An old encyclopedia “The Book of Knowledge”, book 9. It looks like it ought to contain old spells…too bad it isn’t THAT interesting. Foot soak in epsom salt bath.
2/11: Slept some. Odd dream…seemed like a message for a friend. Trading one of the tarot decks that I no longer use. Read a little. Laundry con’t. So tired. This day is gonna see like it goes on forever. Work. Lunch. Work. Laundry. Tired. Read a trashy romance before bed.
2/12: slept some…not sure how much due to odd dreams and hot flashes…so yeah tired. Found a grocery price book app, entered details. Laundry. Don’t have the brains to read anything more serious than another trashy romance book. Got a stack of ’em that my MIL was getting rid of… Errands. Went to pick up Boychild who had school sponsored ski lesson and is tired and out of sorts. His teacher asked if we wanted to bump up our P/T conference. He’s doing well and his teacher likes him but she also doesn’t seem to take his nonsense. Getting him to do his homework tonight was a struggle and meant we didn’t get to make cookies together. He made them under his father’s supervision while I went to decompress at craft night. Feeling like I don’t fit in tonight…here at home and everywhere else. Listening to my husband plan out the weekend, I can’t help but wonder if he’s going to fit me in somewhere. I feel like leftovers. I vary from feeling like a selfish bitch to just being angry.
2/13: took Magnesium last night and I slept. First night in about a week or so. So there you go. Still woke up often which sometimes woke up the brain gerbil but was able to go back to sleep. Late getting up as we forgot to set the boychild’s alarm. He insisted on wearing a button up shirt, nice pants and a bow tie for his Valentine’s party today. Doing the room mother thing. Boychild had too much sugar and then had a screaming, yelling fit the first time he didn’t get his way. He spent over an hour sitting on his bench ’cause I refused to deal with him until he calmed down on his own power. Packed for Denver. Drove down listening to The Silver Chair. After dinner, I ran to B&N to get the boychild a V-day gift. Over to my heartsister’s before finally tumbling into bed.
2/14: just another day…Gave Hubby his coins and boychild his book and bookmark. I got…thank yous. Breakfast with friends. Spent the day with my heartsister and her husband while boychild rode back and forth between there and my inlaws and Hubby worked. At one point, my son admitted that we had a good day because he hadn’t had a lot of sugar. Hubby’s short day of work turned into all day. Dinner with our friends. Sigh. Just another day, just another day. Hard seeing what the others got or did…did have a talk with Hubby before bed…only time will tell if it will make any difference.