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Daily Practices: 1/19 – 1/25

January 25, 2014

Still doing the “good morning/day” and “good night” routine at Zeus and Isis’ shrine plus the water offering at the ancestor shrine.  I don’t always remember to do it first thing in the morning though…

1/19:  some mornings I really wish I could turn off “mommy ears”… plan of attack made for the pot pies, brunch ate, laundry started, pulled what little money is left in savings out to make the credit card payment.  No more money coming in (that I’m aware of) until my next paycheck in two weeks…with 2 more bills to pay and the trip to Wyoming next weekend.  Trying hard not to stress or dwell on it… My therapy is to pin pictures that make me smile.  Bronco game….yay they won!  Now I just wish we had money to buy some of the AFC Champion merchandise!  Made chicken pot pies for dinner…old filling recipe combined with a new  pie dough recipe.  They were pretty good.  Read some.  Hubby came to me with a plan for making the rest of our bills.  Hope it works out.

1/20:  didn’t sleep well but when I did I had weird dreams…the doozy was being back in college and dating Peyton Manning.  A bit of housework and then watched “Cowboys and Aliens” which wasn’t as campy as I expected it to be.  Dinner.  I forgot to call my niece…today is her birthday.  Bad auntie.  Started designing the boychild’s birthday invitation.  Boy was up and down for various reasons, so he will be short of sleep tomorrow.

1/21:  another night of not enough sleep…killing me slowly I’m telling you.  Took the pics for the invitation this morning.  Laundry. 30 minutes of dancing with the boychild.  Taking the boychild to a friends then going to work.  Hubby took a bunch of metal to the recycler in Denver this morning.  By the time dinner rolled around, all of us were tired and cranky.  We couldn’t get the child in bed fast enough.  Need to write on Janus…problem is I’ve already wrote about him…so I’ll probably write a poem and then refer to the original blog…tomorrow though.  Too tired to write today.  Ugliness between siblings rears its head in the memorial planning for my husband’s grandmother.  I’m SO not looking forward to this trip.

1/22:  difficulty getting to sleep last night (again!)…then I somehow figured out (don’t ask me how as I was beyond tired) that I needed to relax my 3rd eye chakra.  Once I did that (again no idea how…something about going from purple to lavender…) I went to sleep.  It sound totally weird but as long as it works I DON’T CARE!  Again strange dreams though the only one I remember is the one where I’m following OSO, his wife and HER boyfriend in a car.  I came to the realization that there was no point in following, she wasn’t ever going to allow what I wanted and so I stopped following.  I just drove away.  A rather painful liberation…  Blog on Janus…a bit of a cheat as it is mostly a quote from Ovid.  Hubby says he only has half the amount he needs for the remaining bills…yet is still abed and it is almost noon.  [head/desk] I know he hasn’t been sleeping well either but neither is this generating income.  Worked on birthday party invitations.  Purple crayon in dryer…on my new shirt…must…not…kill…child.  Worked very hard on not screaming at my child and I definately didn’t get within arm reach of him.  A friend made the mistake of asking me a question…to which I burst into tears.  Mortifying.  I need this month to be over already.  Stayed busy at work tonight.  Finished up the dryer and got laundry going again.  Scrubbed the shirt, maybe I’ll get lucky…Watched a video about using a Sa Ta Na Ma meditation that is supposed to help with insomnia.

1/23:  You know one of the problems with insomnia is that eventually you feel like you don’t know HOW to go to sleep.  I did use STNM mantra.  Every time I woke up, every time my mind wandered I’d mentally say it or some version of it cause eventually I started saying anything that was close.  I did sleep more and my third-eye chakra doesn’t ache as much today.  I think it is a matter of overwhelming the mental gerbil with boredom so it shuts down…or something.  Hubby left the house around 10!  Yay, happy to see him up and at ’em.  Exercised.  Finishing laundry.  Most of the crayon is gone off the shirt…except where it left dark marks. Tarot reading.  Internet research.  Craft night where I ended up picking out almost everything I had stitched…  Discussion with Hubby where he ended up lecturing me on things he needs to do to get us back in financial shape.  When I pointed out that I don’t do any of those things, he commented that he knew that and then went back to lecturing…

1/24:  Called my mom…ended up crying and whining…which is NOT why I called.  Putting away laundry and figuring out what to where to the memorial.  Surprisingly I don’t have any black slacks.  I didn’t want to wear a skirt for traveling but that’s what I’m stuck with… Packed up clothes.  Denver.  Tired.  Emotionally I’m uncomfortable at my inlaws’ house now.  The feeling of constant judgement because I do things differently than they would like is very wearing.  Throw in the unstable emotional atmosphere due to the recent death of my father-in-law’s mother (and the associated arguments with siblings) and everything is a lot worse.  Being drug out of bed early in the morning so that we can make the drive to BFE, Wyoming.  Joy.

1/25:  awake, showered and dressed before 7:30…you should applaud as I haven’t done that in a long time.  Up to Wyoming and back to Denver…that’s 5-7 hours of total drive time…my son and I listened to audio books to pass the time.  Seeing family we don’t normally see was nice.  The siblings were…not getting along…arguments over money, using pictures that hadn’t been agreed upon, etc.  The memorial was a Catholic affair…boring…don’t miss that a bit and even my son was incredulous over how long things took.  I can’t really complain about it but neither did it move me.  The child was very well behaved which was nice because he was woefully short of sleep.  Happy to be back and able to sleep in tomorrow…

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