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Thankful Day 30

November 30, 2011
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This ends my month of remembered thanks.  I’m glad I did it. I’m thankful it is done.  I managed to post something every day, no matter how small or lame it sounded.  It did put me in a frame of mind that was more…well mindful.  It encouraged me to find something good in every day and some days that was very hard.

I’m a pessimist.  I became one at some point in my past to protect my tender heart.  If I always expect the worst, some how it doesn’t seem to hurt as much or at least that is what I tell myself.  I’m still very bitter over the relationship that was lost.  Some days it colors every thought.  Other days I am blissfully unaware but optimistic and positive?  Not so much.  For some reason, this month of thankfulness has effected me more than it did last year.  I will from time to time probably fall back to it.  Hopefully I will remember to do it at the times when I am the very angry or heart-breaking sad.  Because it will be then that I will need to reminded most that I have a good life with a good husband, a wonderful son, my health and all my basic necessities are more than met.

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